Wednesday, September 26, 2007

When our words come back to haunt us

This past week was full of tons for me to do. Joe's family was coming in town for a wedding. Aunts, Uncles, Cousins, his parents, sister and her family...all were coming and would be joining us for dessert on Friday night. Needless to say, I had plenty to do to get ready. Not that I minded but there was lots to do. And, I guess the stress got to me a bit as I picked up the same things over and over again. You know, the kids' clothes, toys and shoes that can't seem to find their way to the proper place...ever?! Millie was following me around with a deck of cards in her hands. As I looked back at her, I noticed the entire deck was no longer together. She'd left a trail. I suppose it was just in case we got lost in her brothers' closet and needed to find our way back out. Kinda smart since the closet was a disaster area. Anyway, in my frustration of having to stop the clutter control of my closet duty and focus on finding all 52 cards, I think my voice may have left calm and entered an obvious peeved volume. She looked at me calmly and said, "Mommy, I think you need a nap."
No. There was no nap for me but the humor of her comment (the same one I'd made to her a zillion times) was just the kick in the pants I needed to put it all back in perspective and get it all done. Thanks Millie!

Wednesday, September 19, 2007

Questioning my self-image

There are just 2 months standing between me and the fourth decade of my life. Up until a week ago, I was quite comfortable with what was ahead of me. In fact, I was looking forward to this milestone. Oprah is the woman who put me at ease. When she turned 50, she went on and on about how empowering it was. It was hearing her comments that changed my idea of maturing. (I choose the word maturing over aging because I don't like the connotations society has put on the word aging, especially where women are concerned.) So, what changed in the past week to shake my resolve? Maybe noticing my skin isn't as elastic as it once was? Perhaps it's the adult acne that erupts monthly? Oh, maybe it is the little lines around my mouth and eyes? No. No. No. It's my husband, that's what. There have been two different instances when he decided it would be a good idea to tell me the outfit (two different ones) I was wearing may be a little young for me. WHAT?!!! He tried to talk his way out of it. I suggested he stop talking. In my defense, I am 5'2" and weigh...well, I don't want to tell you, but it's not enough to allow me to give blood. So, I wear a 0 or a 2 depending on the brand. And, I can find things that fit in the girl's department but it's been years since I've done that. No, the outfits he was referring to came form real stores for grown-ups. I don't know, maybe he's expecting me to turn frumpy at forty. Perhaps he's looking for more poly-blends to appear in my closet come November 27. Dare he suggest I start wearing "mom jeans"?
Honestly, I'm quite comfortable in my clothes. Maybe I'll buy some new duds that look less young but that I still like. But I can assure you this...frumpy at forty? Forget it!

Monday, September 10, 2007

Catching My Breath!

Whew! School is back in session now for all three of my kids. Jonathan started 7th grade (one more year of middle school -yikes!); Porter is now a 2nd grader and Millie is in an awesome 3-day program at our church. All three have enjoyed returning to a schedule and they all like their teachers. But, before you assume I have time to sit back and relax into my new-found time alone, let me assure you, there is a reason it's been so long since my last's called the return of our scheduled, over-active calendar. Some would call it calendaritis, others may say I'm raising well-rounded children. You see, Jonathan is playing soccer (on a premier traveling team), playing cello, involved in student council and youth group at church. Porter is playing football ('s just his second season) and is starting scouts. Thankfully, Millie is sitting this year out with extra-curricular activities, she's only three after all. So, when you look at our family calendar, we have one weeknight at home together, Wednesday. Of course, this has meant my husband has had to give up his night of mountain biking and it will probably be forever until I have a night to join my girlfriends for a night out. Before we start to feel too resentful, I think we need to start entertaining more on the weekends (when we're not out of town with the soccer team!). Joe and I had already...before all this chaos...decided we were going to pick a day each month to go out either just the two of us or with friends. So, we need to institute that and keep it up.
Over-scheduled or well-rounded, this is my family's life. There will come a day, sooner than I can imagine I'm sure, when Joe and I are sitting at home with no soccer or football uniforms tumbling in the dryer, no cello music playing in the background, no scouting badges left to earn, and no carpools to run and we will be a little sad. We'll wonder where the time went. Sure, we'll no doubt be proud of who each of them became but we'll miss the boy who without fail notifies me of a meeting the day of and can't understand why my schedule cannot change, the sweaty-headed boy who can come up with a million excuses why he doesn't need a shower after practice, and the oh so talkative little girl who rarely allows me to get a thought in sideways. Until then, just think how special Wednesday nights will be! (Two more days!)